Slow Mo Football

Everyday, I witness a choreographed performance of Slow Mo Football.  Usually, the team that is playing is different each day.

As I walk in from work, Son #1 sprints down the hallway to the end zone.  He dodges tackles, side steps imaginary cornerbacks and runs the homestretch to score a touchdown.  The imaginary crowd goes wild as Son #1 spikes the ball and proceeds to get a flag for excessive celebration.

Now it is time for the kickoff.  Son #1 kicks it long to the 5 yard line.  Now he is the defense and proceeds to tackle my legs as I put down my purse and take off my jacket.  I go to hang up my jacket while Son #1 body checks me from every angle. 

He shouts.  "Ha ha!  I tackled you.  You're down!"

My response is usually a pronounced.  "Oh no!"

His defense stops the other team.  It's 3 and out.  Good job Son#1!

Now he is on the receiving team.  He catches the kick and begins to run for yardage and possibly a touchdown.  Oh no!  He's tackled at the 40 yard line. 

The imaginary team huddles together and then breaks.  They line up at the line of scrimmage.  I remind him.  "Don't throw the ball in the kitchen or my bedroom."  "Ok Mama."  He replies.  The center hikes the ball.  The quarterback throws it to his star receiver.  Son #1 catches and sprints 50 yards for a touchdown in the final seconds of the game!  The imaginary crowd cheers!  Son #1 and his team win again!


SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE:  GO COWBOYS...WE LOVE YOU ANYWAY!